Fitness Slump & Diet

I've been slacking on my exercise like nobody's business but I had been so active through the whole break unpacking, lifting, moving things, lining cabinets with contact paper, vacuuming, etc that it truly made up for not running in some ways.  However, it's time to get back on that horse.  I am going to start hydrating a bit better this time around.  I noticed that I would not do well because my body was lacking in some things, primarily good hydration and secondly I need to work on bulking up my fruit and veggie intake so I have good energy on my side.  I tend to do a lot of microwave meals because I don't cook often.  Mostly I don't really have time, don't really like to, and my son won't eat anything but toast, hot dogs, McDonalds or Reese's cups now so cooking for me is a bit of overkill.

Speaking of which, my son no longer wants peanut butter sandwiches in his lunch.  He only wants peanuts.  It looks rather odd to send a lunch bag with a container of peanuts.  Yesterday I packed peanuts and two oreos.  Today I packed peanuts, oreos, and cheez-its.  I hope he at least eats those. Yesterday he did but most days his lunch returns untouched.  All he ever wants in the morning at 6AM when we head out is warm strawberry milk then for dinner only wants toast.  A long long time ago he liked warm strawberry pediasure but now won't have anything to do with that either.  He has slowly whittled down his list of foods he likes to next to nothing.  He used to love Tostitos but now he does not care for them.  I seem to have stopped liking them too though.

My mother said I was a super picky eater as a kid and I am still a picky eater.  Certain textures of food make me gag.  The smell of tomatoes is revolting to me and I won't eat them.  I have to prepare my own oatmeal or cream of wheat because if it is too watery or lumpy I won't eat it.  It has to be just right.  Only I know what that means.  :)  I could eat the same thing for days.  I sometimes eat white rice and tuna for dinner all week long. My son tends to be that way too.

Oh well, the nut does not fall to far from the tree apparently.

The move....

The move is done. I am in my new place ... almost fully unpacked and settled in.  I really like the place ... more than I expected.  I say more than I expected because it is a mobile home in a mobile home park but you'd never know it.  It really just looks like a house through and through.  My ex fixed up the whole place, dry walled, carpeted and redid the kitchen floor with hardwoods.  He put in a new tub, sinks for the bathrooms, and was a great help getting my washer and dryer hooked up.   The best part is I am right across from the playground, my son likes it here, and it is a gated little community.  Oh the very best part, my neighbors are quiet and I can't smell them because I am not in an apartment.  No more cigarette stench!

My initial reaction when my ex offered for us to move here was a flat out NO!  He offered it up several times after each time I said I was looking but each time I was totally against it because, 1. it's a mobile home, 2. I did not want to live around these type of people, 3. I was totally put off by becoming trailer trash & 4. My pride.  Pride set aside and giving it a chance was well worth it as well.  So far people here are pretty decent and the place is fairly laid back and very well kept up.

Only weird encounter is a strange toothless black woman who seems to always be looking to bum a cigarette or see if anyonecan spot her a pack til her next pay check.  She's only come around when my ex's truck was parked outside but I made it clear I was not helping her in that area.  I don't support anyone's nasty habits especially when the person is a blatant moocher.  The minute you give them an inch they won't ever leave your doorstep.

The move cost me some physical labor and the $$ funds to pay Two Men and a Truck to move my heavy stuff.  But I say it was well worth it. They did an awesome job and none of my stuff got damaged.  They wrapped all my stuff in blankets and then used plastic wrap to keep them in place.  They moved all my clothes and were very polite and quick and efficient.  These guys were true professionals. 

The place is very cozy and homey (as my son put it) and I think that coziness seems to be good for him. He literally played in his new room without calling for me for a long long while longer than he ever did in the condo.  He's not as afraid and seems right at home ... as if nothing has changed. Earlier he did say something about how it feels weird to be here since we lived in the last place for so many years but he's adjusted very well. 

I like it ... it may not be a permanent move but it will be a while before we move again that is for sure.

Wordless Wednesday

Moving, Stress and Strep

OMG. Can things get more stressful for me. I am moving this weekend so I am boxing things up and moving things myself before the movers get here Saturday to get the heavy things.  I am scheduling service shut off and turning on service at the new place, dealing with Aspie issues, and now I have strep, it's going to rain all night and there are tornado warnings. 

My life is not ever less complicated.  Anytime I plan something utter mayhem ensues.  All I need for there to be next is a freeze alert the morning of my final move.

I got a response from the teacher and they say that basically my son is not dealing well with redirection or being corrected.  When he was told yesterday he would need to do group study with Ms. T, he stomped off angrily, he kicked the trash can and slammed the door.  My son told me just the other day he does not like her again.  I honestly think it is a personality issue because my son does really well with his Speech Therapist and she is quite the type to invade your space and look you in the eye.  Yet he loves that woman!  IF I were a jealous and crazy ass mom, I'd hate her but I love her because my son loves her.  She clearly knows how to motivate my little dude!!!

My gut tells me this teacher probably has an issue with my son.  The other day he was making some vocal noises and apparently she scowled at him and per my son's words she gave him a mean look and he did not like it.  The story I got from Mr R is that she gave him a visual cue then she reprimanded.  See again... here is the problem ASPIE and VISUAL CUE ... not always a good way to get an Aspie to cooperate because a visual cue is not obvious to them ... they usually overlook it because they tend not to make eye contact or really look at you all together so scowling is going to look like you are just being a mean old witch.  Again as I said before my son needs explicit direction.  Even if he gets upset he knows what is expected from him and not confused by mean faces across the room.

I am not just defending him here. I know my little angel can be a hard nut to crack.  I lose hair or gain more gray hairs over him daily but I try my best to see where I can improve my approach with him and cut him some slack without becoming a push over.  Granted I do have more freedoms like raising my voice more and threatening him with a good butt whooping.  The other thing that is changing here is him, he's 10 and growing and nearing puberty.  Clearly I can't predict how this is going to affect him, as I vaguely remember how it affected me. 

I do remember wanting to shave my legs and getting in trouble with my mom for doing something "so" inappropriate.  My mom was overly protective.  I don't know if I got in trouble a lot at his age but I had a few outbursts in school during my 8th grade year.  Family and other life issues were tense then and it bled out in varied ways but my son, as far as I can see, has limited to no family issues that I see as an issue.  Yes I am divorced from his father but we've been since he was 3.  The only new development since my ex's 3rd divorce (I was number 2) is he is dating someone again (LORD!) and my son has met her and her daughter so not sure if this may be a trigger.  I am wondering if this female teacher is resented in some way because my ex is dating again. 

Perhaps that's over thinking things but it's the only hunch I have but it's not a gut feeling either and I am good at surmising what can be happening with my son.  Or it could be the move but my son seems okay with it especially since half the reason we are moving is because we are tired of smelling cigarettes from our downstairs neighbors.  It gets in through the bathroom because they run the fan and it pushes it into my place.  I don't know how many times I have gotten home and had to take a quick look around because I could swear I somehow walked into a smoky bar.  I say smoke to you hearts content but not if you are killing me with you. 

Email to the Teachers on my Aspergers Son

This is an email I sent today to my son's teachers. They are trying but I sometimes have to remind them of my challenges with him and how often I am around him where I have the opportunity to see every little detail of each of his weeks/days at school.

Hi there,
I know you are still continuing to struggle with my son on group work.  I just wanted to see if you had any updates for me or if I can be of any assistance.

I did see the notes on his re-do homework from when we met.  His dad actually got it a week after he and I completed together and returned it.  My son lives with me 50% of the time so his dad and I rotate every 7 days with him, so there are times we each get a continued portion of an assignment that was done with the other parent at some point.  I know you are busy and can't make lengthy notes on everything that comes home to us for him but just so you know he goes to his dad's this Friday for a week and then I get him next Friday.   I hope that helps a bit.
We try not to change this schedule on him as much as possible since the consistency with each of us helps to keep him from having more meltdowns or issues with shutting down.  My son is very prone to clamming up once he's upset and we have yet to figure out how to bring him back from these long lapses of silence and anger.

He did mention to me, Mr R, that yesterday during a reading assignment he did not understand a question that was posed about what he thought the character was saying.  Because he processes everything as how he sees it, the more abstract question which was "what do you think the character is thinking here?" was annoying to him because the book was actually telling in some way what the character was thinking but he could not understand why you would ask him what he was thinking when the book was clearly stating what the character was thinking.

It's this black and white thinking without gray area that can make it hard to work with my son.  You have to sometimes be very explicit as to what you want from him or he will get frustrated because what you say to him is what you mean and any shade of insinuation is completely missed by him.

Feel free to email me at the email account anytime so we can communicate more often. I really want to help but since his school is about an hour drive from where I work and live it makes it a bit of a challenge for me. 

School Stuff and Math

My son has been struggling with comprehension of some math stuff recently. It's all about fraction comparison so I have worked with him at night to help him and he seems to understand it but in class he struggles with the teacher and the teaching method of getting into groups.

My son does not like his math  teacher.  I met her two weeks ago during a meeting with my son's regular teacher and I can see to some degree why he does not like her.  She has a drawn down mouth and she opens her eyes really wide to the point of her eyes nearly bugging out.  I think because my son has aspergers/autism ... he finds her expression confusing. Is she alarmed, sad, annoyed, high, scared?  I had trouble myself discerning her expression as I explained what and why my son does what he does.

She seems very frustrated that she can't get my son to communicate with her.  She says he just shuts down and walks off and leaves her class.  For one, she is a regular ed teacher.  So I imagine her limited knowledge of autism/aspergers adds to her exasperation.  Read up on it! is what I wanted to say ... maybe she has who knows.  Secondly, my son either loves you or hates you ... no in between, no gray area, no kind of sort of likes you.... he just has two speeds.  Love or Hate.

I don't know what to do if he does not want to work in groups with her how can we force him.  Any suggestions out there?  I am to the point where I need to find some help but I can't afford any support that is not covered by insurance.

I win... sometimes

I totally won something last week from a blog I follow.  See what I won here at Airing My Dirty Laundry.  These cute cards.  I already know who I will send them to.  My mom and my sister probably.

I seldom win anything so it is nice to win something for a change, right?  The last time I won anything was years ago.  It was an iPod nano.  I still have it but it won't hold a charge anymore... oh sigh.  I have an iPhone now but that is my work cell phone so I can't really call it mine mine. But I still load it with music and junk. I am sure I will end up keeping it if I ever leave .. not like they'll want it after it's not worth anything and the newer generations of phones make it useless and slow.  Maybe people can collect all the old iPhones in the world and tile their kitchens with them like a back splash of sorts or just recycle them for parts I guess.

I keep entering bottle cap codes to My Coke rewards in hopes that I will win a new washer and dryer.  I don't think anyone really wins anything on that site. I'd like to meet someone who did.  I did cash in some points months back for a new set of stainless steel pots though.  2 pots and 1 pan with lids.  It's a nice set.

Luckily the bulk of the codes I collect come from the ex-MIL because she buys Coke products like her life depends on it.  They literally buy my son cases of blue powerade, his favorite drink.  I buy him several bottles and make him ration it out through the week.   Every week I pick him up from his grandparents I get a zip lock bag full of bottle caps.  It's cool of them to do that but it does take time from my day to enter all those damn codes when I finally sit down to do it.  I think Coca Cola should really offer better rewards though. The sweepstakes have great stuff but the rewards where you can cash in your points are useless things like mouse pads, t-shirts, caps.  Ugh.  At least the pots and pans were decent.  I mean t-shirts?  And you have to use a lot of points for them.  I can just go to Goodwill and get t-shirts.

Anyway the time change is here and now mornings are bright but it will be dark by 5 or 6pm .... blah!

Post Halloween

When I have a good picture of my son dressed as a ninja I will post it to my blog.  He was with my ex last night but the pic he sent me was super fuzzy and small.  He apparently does not know how to use technology or has an "unsmart" phone.

It was nice not to be out freezing my ass off for Halloween.  I ran 4.5 miles last night and stayed home after, cozy under a blanket watching NCIS and then went to bed earlier than usual.

I used to really miss taking my son trick or treating if it was not my year to do so but this year I felt like I really just wanted a break from the hectic pace so I was very glad to let his dad have his turn.  I'm surprised my ex-MIL did not insist on tagging along.  From what my son said it was just him, his friend and his dad.  Perhaps her arthritis was just too bad for her to stand the cold.  Unfortunately, such is life when you age.  It takes you out of some activities when your body won't deal well with the changes in weather or you have pain just from being cold.

I hope I don't have too many aches and pains as I get older but I am sure I will at some point.  I already have some pain in my right hand from typing and using a mouse at work.  Some pain on my left knee and left ankle achilles tendon has also started to cause me some grief but that is from running and a bit of over training.