Last 5 months of 5th grade

So we are down to the last 5 months of 5th grade and it's IEP time.  I never dread IEP time for some reason. When I hear other parents talking about it or blogging about it, it sounds like it's the end of the world.  I just see it like an employer performance review; where you are currently, goals and improvements etc.  Nobody is perfect and I imagine no child is and more specifically a challenged child.  I see it as guidelines for my son and myself to follow.

I do dread the meltdowns and the questions that ensue from administrators/principals ... I always feel accused, as if like a migraine there was something I fed him that turned him from a sweet Mogwai to a raging Gremlin.  I don't always know the answer to this riddle.  Some days he won't meltdown over the same issue which days prior set him off like a bottle rocket in July.

What I am dreading most is the change to middle school, new teachers, new bus driver, new friends and possibly a school that may be even further away from where I work.  The last big meltdown he had I was pressured to hurry and get there because he could not be contained ... as if he'd become the incredible kid hulk or something.  Unfortunately I work an hour from his school so no matter where I move as far as my home goes the drive will not change from work.  The further the school, the further and longer my drive will be to come to their rescue when he is tearing his classroom to pieces.  I unfortunately, don't own a leer jet.  And since his dad does lawn maintenance he seldom hears his phone or is close enough to help.

I was told I would have no say in the school they place him so long as it has the Asperger setting he needs but I refuse to believe this is acceptable.  I hope that they place him closer to where I moved which is still 20 minutes + from where I live but much better than an hour.  And the school that is further away would put the drive at one and a half hours from where I work.  Yea not good.

The only plus to this is that is grandparents are retired and could get out there to get him but if he is in full rage mode they won't be able to control him. He is much too strong for them and as they age it will only get harder.  So I hope he has less and less major meltdowns the older he gets because he will eventually be taller than me and his dad and neither of us would be strong enough to contain him.

I guess sometimes fears become larger than life.